60 Bad Hotels That Didn’t Get a Five-Star Review But Will Make You LOL
Hotel pictures and descriptions don’t always live up to how they are in real life. Sometimes, you show up and you think, wow, what a great place, only to turn back the sheets and be greeted with a surprise. Of course, the opposite is also true. You think it’s one of those really bad hotels and then, BAM, you’re offered the sweetest welcome.
Today, we’re going to take a look at the former — the bad hotels that may claim to be a five star but are not following through. If you travel a lot, there’s a good chance one of the following 60 nightmares has happened to you. Just try not to cringe.
1. Let Your Imagination Run Wild As You Gaze Through The Curtains Onto Paradise
Where is the view?
Was this supposed to be a tease?
2. If You Want Wi-Fi You First Have To Pass This Spelling Bee Test
It makes sense why you don’t want someone to steal your wifi, but this is excessive.
Jeez!
3. The Place Where Every Customer’s Opinion Is Valued
Customer opinions should matter.
Not at this bad hotel!
4. Better To Be Safe Than Sorry
It’s good to be extra cautious.
Extra water!
5. It’s The Thought That Counts, Right?
The idea was there.
But they did not think it through.
6. Through Door Number One You’ll Find a Bathroom — You’ll Also Find a Closet. Choose Wisely!
Which one will you choose?
It will be confusing in the middle of the night!
7. Toilet Paper Faux Pas At Its Finest
This was a poor design.
Hopefully, no one makes a mess.
8. At Least They’ve Got Their Privacy
Imagine trying to get a beautiful view on your vacation and you end up with this.
FAIL.
9. Hotel Gifts That Are More Rewarding To Open Than They Are To Enjoy
What a waste of space!
Chocolate is delicious, but they could have used smaller packaging for this.
10. Perhaps a Wall or a Two-Way Mirror Would Be a Better Option — No One Needs To See That
If you are in the hotel with family or friends, this can get awkward.
Close your eyes!
11. The Perfect Hotel for Practicing Your Parkour
Has anyone tried to get up there?
There have probably been lots of hospital visits!
12. The Real Question Is Which Combination Will Open the Chamber of Secrets?
It’s probably the gold one.
Or is that too obvious?
13. Objects In Mirror Are Further Away Than They Appear
That is too close.
Terrible angle!
14. Somebody Call The Locksmith!
Do you feel safe?
We don’t!
15. Keeping You Partially Cooled and 100% Guessing Whether The Other Half Is In The Room Next To You
Was this laziness?
Plus, it’s next to the TV. You will not be able to hear anything.
16. Too Hot To Handle
I guess we are going to the “el” this weekend.
Ha, get it?
17. Candles Also Emit Light, Right?
Candles are supposed to make the room light up and smell nice.
This defeats the whole purpose.
18. Couldn’t Afford The Sexy Ceiling Mirror So You’ll Have To Use Your Imagination
We aren’t trying to be immature here but…
This is hysterical.
19. Thou Shalt Not Pass
They made an exit sign hard to get through.
Doesn’t that defeat the whole purpose?
20. Kudos To The Designer
Welp, this was not a good idea.
How did this get approved?
21. Top Points for Creativity, Even If It Is a Little Gross
Disgusting.
But smart.
22. They Must Have Had a Buy One Get One Free Sale on This Superb Artwork. What a Steal!
Psh, not creative.
They probably should put this in the next bedroom.
23. The Only Cinema Where You’d Want To Be In The Front Row
The screen needs to be bigger in order for this to work.
If it’s not, it fails.
24. Going Up or Going Down? Who Knows on These Tricky Stairs
This can end badly.
We don’t know if it’s going up or down.
25. If You Stand In The Center of The Pool While There’s a Torrential Down Pour and Close Your Eyes, It Will Feel Like You’re Swimming
Swimming in the rain.
Not.
26. Art Work Reminiscent of What You Find In The Drain From Time To Time
It either looks like long pieces of hair on a painting.
Or it looks like germs everywhere.
27. There’s a Great View But It’s Just Obscured By This Massive, Ugly Building
Tear down that wall!
We deserve a great view.
28. The Place Where China Is The Center of The Universe
Is this in China?
It would be cool to know if people there think China takes up half of the world like this.
29. The Real Kicker Is, How Did They Know!?!
Did they know our plans?
Oops. Next time, we need to be more careful.
30. Don’t Smoke, But If You Do, Here’s an Ashtray
Just in case you want to break the rules.
What rebels.
31. No Shakers Required Salt and Pepper Shakers
The whole purpose of these shakers is to store lose alt and pepper.
But they shouldn’t hold packages like these.
32. “You Can’t Eat This Soup Standing Up, Your Knees Buckle.” — Jerry Seinfeld, In The Soup Nazi
Is this a typo?
Ideally, you don’t want soup on your hands. You want soap.
33. Braille Can Be Read Through Plexiglas, Right?
What a fail.
Hopefully, they fix this.
34. You Gotta Wonder How Many Fish WereCleaned In Rooms Before This Sign Was Put Up
Oh no, they found out our plans!
What shall we do now?
35. You’ll Eventually Get To The Right Room, Just Press All The Buttons
It will be a fun adventure.
Make sure to explore each floor!
36. The Hotel Gym Where Two of Your Doppelgangers Exist
Too many mirrors.
What one is the real him?
37. Big Brother Is Watching — So Is The Front Desk
What do they want to know about our life?
This is an invasion of privacy.
38. Samuel L. Jackson Says, “Go The F*ck To Sleep”
Stay asleep.
Or Samuel L. Jackson will haunt your dreams.
39. The Bong Is Lit
This is a weird way to use this, but why?
We think it’s such a waste.
40. Looks Like This Hotel Wanted to Give Dr. Seuss a Run for His Money, Confusing Patrons Along The Way
Wow, this is confusing.
Totally not cool!
41. Typical Germans, Always with The Nein and Never with The Ja
Has this happened before?
People are disgusting.
42. Are People Cooking Dogs and Cats in Their Rooms?
This is not normal.
What is wrong with people?
43. In Case of Fire, Do Nothing
Wait, what are we supposed to use?
Just hope for the best?
44.) Lost In Translation
Read it a few times.
You will laugh and shake your head.
45. Looks Like Washing Your Hands Might Prove To Be a Bit Difficult
We might as well take a shower.
Grab your shampoo!
46. Beware of Dog Only If It’s That Time of The Month or You’re Craving a Late Night Snack
Wow, what a nasty dog!
Remember not to feed it.
47. For the Love of God Order Some New Mattresses
Get a new mattress because this is disgusting.
There is probably bed bugs!
48. Why Oh Why Isn’t The Air Conditioning Working? Hrmmmmm
As long as it’s cool in our hotel, who cares.
This may smell bad though.
49. Turn The Tap Left for Vanilla and Right for Chocolate
Does it taste like chocolate?
Or is this just nasty?
50. Instead of Paying for The Snack Bar, Try These!
We heard that they are high in protein.
Yum!
51. All The Money Was Used Up Creating The Most Awesome and Inviting Hotel Ever …
This is false advertising.
Get better pictures. People may go there!
52. The Interior Decorator of This Room Should Find a New Profession
What is on the walls?
Is it supposed to be a design?
53. Adventure Time Includes Wading Around The Toilets and Garbage
Whoever has to clean this up needs a raise.
They deserve all of the raises!
54. That Doesn’t Look Very Promising
Hotel? Motel? Holiday Inn?
Nah, we don’t think so.
55. You Choose: Bottom Bunk or Hammock That Looks Like It’s About To Collapse
The person in the hammock with fall and hit the person in the bed.
They will both be in for a rude awakening.
56. This Toilet Companion Only Bites Always
First, you should run!
Second, give them a one-star review.
57. At Least The Price Is Right
$5 is a bargain, but this does not look safe.
We might pass on this.
58. Some Hotels Pull Out All The Stops To Make Sure Their Customers Leave Satisfied
So, did they use it?
You should probably throw it out.
59. What Was That Pulled Out of?
Ew, call the front desk.
Who knows if this is a wig or real.
60. Welcome To The Place Nightmares Are Made of
This looks like its part of a horror film.
It will definitely haunt your dreams tonight.
Have any of these horrendously bad hotels fail situations happened to you? It’s always better when you can relate to someone else’s struggles. We hope you’ve enjoyed this article. Please comment below if you want to share your story!
**Special thanks to Bored Panda and College Humor for sourcing these over-the-top hotel fail photos.
