I Quit My Job at Meta and Flew to Bali to Find Myself, Moved Back Home

In the fall of 2022, I quit my job and booked a flight to Bali in pursuit of my very own Eat, Pray, Love experience. Yet I found myself feeling more lost and confused than ever before, so I returned to the States and had to move back into my childhood home.

I have no regrets about spending $5,000 on a trip to Bali, but I wish I knew I couldn’t run away from my inner turmoil no matter how far I went.

My events job at Meta was tough to transition online

I started working at Meta in the fall of 2019 within its global security department. My job was to plan everything from company-wide holiday parties to small shareholder meetings, ensuring the proper executive protection and medical personnel were present.

I had so much fun planning events out of the Bay Area office headquarters and loved how dynamic and busy it kept me.

But when the pandemic hit, my main tasks were pivoted to data analytics. Two years went by without the return of in-person events, and I lost my spark for work.

My job turned into something entirely different than what I signed up for and I wasn’t looking forward to my day-to-day tasks. I knew it was time to move on, but I was afraid to let go of a secure paycheck.

I started working a weekend gig at an event planning agency to satisfy my event interest while I held on to my job at Meta. A few months later, my roommate in San Francisco decided to move out and I was faced with a decision to either stay at Meta and find my own apartment or use this as my moment to move on.

I’d spent the last two years saving up money, including $5,000 exclusively for travel, so I knew I could financially sustain a few months away from work. I thought a vacation would clear my head and allow me to figure out what I really wanted to do with my life.

I quit my job and flew to Bali

I quit my job at Meta in the fall of 2022, didn’t renew my lease, and booked a two-month trip to Bali. I decided on Bali because of its reputation as a healing, spiritual place with cultural traditions rooted in gratitude. I chose to do a yoga retreat because I’d been practicing for years and wanted to be surrounded by like-minded people.

On the outside, Bali was exactly what I expected. My trip was filled with delicious vegan food, endless yoga classes, and cafés filled with digital nomads. The island is gorgeous and I had ample time to explore the lush nature.

However, it was a lot more commercialized than I expected. Most of my immediate surroundings were Westernized and catered exclusively to tourists and people like me, who all bought into the same Bali fantasy of a spiritual reset.

I felt more lost than ever

I went in with all these grand plans of creating social media travel content, meeting new friends, and figuring out next steps for my career.

But I found myself completely alone, overcome with social anxiety, and too overwhelmed to film anything. The pressure I put on myself to make something of this vacation sent me into complete decision paralysis.

I hoped to emerge from a meditation with a revelation about what I should do with my life, but I felt more lost than ever.

Rather than the time away clearing my head, it made space for me to ruminate over the fact that I was 27, an age when it seemed like most of my friends were either making their way up the corporate ladder, starting families, or settling down. I grappled with the fact that I didn’t have any of the things I thought defined success at my age.

I moved back into my childhood home

After two months in Bali, I flew back to the Bay Area and had to move into my childhood home. My parents don’t live there year-round so I had the place largely to myself, but it felt weird to return.

It was humbling and frankly embarrassing to reflect on the fact that I had given up everything to travel the world and find myself, but the only place I found myself was back in my childhood bedroom. It forced me to look inward and rediscover what the little girl who once lived here wanted. I could run away, I could travel again, but I knew I’d always have to come home to myself.

I continued working part-time at the events company, and it reawakened my passion for events and in-person interactions. I stifled the social anxiety I struggled with in Bali and successfully advocated to my bosses for a promotion. Now, I’m working more hours and taking on more responsibility and creative liberties.

I’m also planning on getting my yoga teacher training and using my events background to lead international yoga retreats. Who knows, maybe I’ll even return to Bali to lead a yoga retreat.

I’m still living in my childhood home, which I feel is common but not talked about enough. The Bay Area is expensive, and while it’s not exactly what I imagined for myself at 29, I’m happy to be here during this stage of my life. I’m excited to one day have a place of my own, but for now, I’m in no rush to leave until I feel financially secure.

I don’t have any regrets

I wouldn’t take back my experience in Bali for a second, but I wish I had more realistic expectations. I set myself up for disappointment by relying on my vacation as a crutch for my identity crisis. The reality is that I just needed time with myself, regardless of the place.

I am, however, happy that I trusted my intuition and left Meta. Though it’s going to be a long journey, I’m finally on a career path that aligns with my passions and goals.

If you quit your high-paying job without a backup plan and would like to tell your story, email Tess Martinelli at [email protected]