Local Expert and American Tourist to Find London’s Best Fish and Chips

• Food Wars hosts Harry Kersh and Joe Avella travel across the city to find the best fish and chips
• We visited the tourist favorite, the best rated spot, an expert’s pick, and a wild card location
• We only had a day to try each and make a decision

Following is a transcript of the video:

Harry: I’m a London local, and I think London has some of the best food in the world. I’ve invited my friend Joe Avella over from the US to teach him how we do things slightly differently over here. We’ll be visiting the tourist favorite, the best-rated fish-and-chip spot, the expert’s pick, and a wild card all in one day to see if we can find London’s best fish and chips. This is “Food Tours.” Our first stop of the day: Poppies.

Well, so this is Poppies. We’re in their Soho location. They’ve got a few locations scattered around London, so it is kind of like a chain, but also very highly reviewed. Joe: Yeah, I noticed on the menu, “National Fish and Chips Awards winner.” Harry: There you go.

Joe: So, I’m seeing on this menu you got cod or haddock. What’s the difference? Harry: Cod tends to be a little bit meatier. Haddock I think is kind of a flatter fish, in general, so it ends up being a bit more crispy when you eat it. It’s kind of personal preference. I grew up in the south, where we tend to go for cod. I think haddock’s a little bit more popular up north, but it’s really up to you. There are other fish. Joe: Yo, I’m seeing skate, I’m seeing rock, I’m seeing sol-ay, or sole. What is it? Sole. Sole? Well, apparently filet is “fil-ette,” so I don’t know how you guys are pronouncing anything.

Harry: I feel like we’ve gotta go for the traditional side, which is the mushy peas. Joe: Oh, peas? I don’t like peas. Harry: Have you had mushy peas before? Joe: No, I hate peas. Harry: OK, well this is going to be fun then. And I also, over there, a jar of pickled eggs has caught my eye. Not happening. Not happening right now. Harry: When in Rome … Joe: Nope, we’re not in Rome, we’re in London, and I’m not eating pickled anything. Pickled egg, what is that?

Harry: It’s an egg that you boil and then put in vinegar. Too early to get a beer? Yes, categorically. Server: Spiffing, fish and chips. Joe: [laughs] Spiffing! Spiffing. What the f— does that mean? He said spiffing. The f— that means. Is that, so, you’d say spiffing for what? Harry: I mean, I wouldn’t say spiffing. It’s, like, an old-school thing. [posh accent] Oh, terribly spiffing fish and chips. Joe: [posh accent] Right ho, mate. Cheerio.

Harry: Cheers. Joe: Oh, yeah. Harry: There we go. Give me some first impressions. You’ve got the haddock, I have the cod. Joe: Looks incredible. Fries are just how I like them. Thick enough, they look crispy. I will say, just more of a UK thing, gotta salt it, guys. Come on. You got an American here. Everything has to taste like insanity. Harry: Are you going to be tempted by any vinegar? So you put it on the fish and the chips? You might see it more used on the chips rather than the fish. Some people will just dump it all over.

Joe: Also their own little carrying case for the tartar sauce. Tartar sauce. Are you a tartar-sauce fan? Yeah. I feel like in America they just dump it on there and you dip it or whatever. In the jar seems like it’d be harder to put it on there. Ketchup? Harry: Little ketchup. I personally wouldn’t, but it’s personal preference. I personally would. Yeah, it looks good in there, buddy. Harry: It does look good. Cheers.

Joe: I got halibut? Harry: Haddock. Joe: Haddock. Harry: Haddock. Cheers. Oh, yeah. Harry: Mm-hmm. Joe: But I’m responding probably the most favorably to the crispiness. And I think the crispy-outside-to-fish ratio for this specifically is really good.

Harry: Good. This fish is, like, so flaky. Like, melts in your mouth, almost. This, though, this fish, I could easily eat this on its own without the tartar sauce. I won’t, but the fish is fantastic. And I want to try a little bit of yours. Harry: Yeah, we’ve gotta swap some fish here. Wait, I think I’ve changed my mind. Harry: Yeah? Before, I was like, “Oh, I like how this has the more crispy stuff.”

Harry: Are you a convert now? The meatier, that was really good. That was really good. I kind of prefer that one, you know. I think we might have ordered wrong. We’re swapping over. There you go. Harry: Nice. Good job. Joe: Oh, man. This is fantastic! See, I love the crispy batter. That’s maybe my favorite part of the fish and chips. But you’re saying you quite like the meat in that. The fish, I mean, the cod is cooked perfectly. I think that is what does it. This is what is difficult about doing this work is, like, I could kill this.

Harry: Destroy this immediately, yeah. Joe: But we have three more. Harry: We’ve gotta pace ourselves. We need to talk about the mushy peas. [Joe groans] You said you’re not a peas guy in general. Joe: No, but mushy peas aren’t really a thing in the United States, though. So, these probably are slightly different to the peas you’re used to eating. These are actually marrowfat peas, so these are larger peas.

Joe: I mean, it looks like poorly made pea soup. [Harry laughs] Like someone made it and they didn’t add enough water. Harry: They forgot to blend it. So, I don’t like peas normally. I think they’re weird. I’ve never liked the taste. I mean, it wasn’t as bad as I thought. The mushiness actually helps with the consistency of it, but yeah. It doesn’t taste like refried beans, but it’s kind of close. Right! I got that kind of, yeah. Maybe now you kind of get maybe some fish, maybe even a chip in there, and some peas.

Joe: I’m doing everything. I’m doing everything. Harry: And some tartar sauce. Joe: A touch of the parsley in there too? Harry: [laughs] I think you’re good without the parsley. Joe: OK. Harry: Cheers. That’s a really good mouthful. Together, it’s fantastic. Oh, my goodness. Why does that work so well together? I can’t believe it. Like, I was just doing that for fun, but if I was just doing this on my own, like, by myself, I’d be kind of like … and I would literally be mixing everything together like a 6-year-old. Just like, blop blop blop! Fantastic. Again, not a peas guy, but in the future, if I’m getting fish and chips somewhere in the United States, I’m going to ask for mushy peas. I bet they won’t have it, though. This was so good. This was so good. Shall we?

Harry: I feel like a good note to end on might be these pickled eggs. [Joe sighs] Joe: Ready? Bite the whole thing, or? Oh, there you go. No. What’s wrong with it for you? How it tastes. If I had to pinpoint one thing, eh, the taste. Harry: The flavor. We brought you around on mushy peas, so I think one out of two’s not bad. Joe: Yeah, OK, fine. Mushy peas. They’re better, yeah. So you go to a place, they got a big jar of pickled things in there, and you’re just going to get it. You’re not worried about how it was handled, how long it’s been there? The vinegar’s taking care of all that. You’re fine. Joe: It’s taking care of what? All that. What? That guy’s fishing it out with his bare hands. “I’m sure it’s fine.” Harry: Yeah. Vinegar’s taking care of it. All good. I’m not getting … OK. Vinegar’s taking care of it. Look, dude, I could easily eat this whole thing and have a fantastic rest of my day. But we got more places to go to, so.

Harry: We do. Save some room. Let’s go to the next spot. Let’s do it. Flawless hair. I’m related to that guy? Joe: All right. Chris: Teasing your taste buds. Crew: Joe, what did he call you? He called me a yank! [everyone laughs] I mean, is that an insult? I don’t know. Crew: Yeah, kind of. Oh, fantastic. All right. All right, Joe, welcome to The Golden Chippy. Love it. Love to see it. What do you think? Good vibe in here? Joe: Yeah, I really like the vibe in here. It’s actually pretty cool. I know we’re normally getting the cod. Anything else in here you want to try? Yeah, we haven’t tried a plaice yet, so we can maybe go for a plaice.

Joe: Yeah, that works. What about sides? Anything? Harry: I think what we might go for this time is a battered sausage. Joe: A battered sausage? Harry: Have you had a battered sausage before? Joe: I definitely haven’t. I mean, is that like a corn dog? You’ll take a good pork British sausage, batter it, fry it, serve it. It’s great. Maybe some curry sauce. Joe: Dude, I love the curry sauce. Let’s go. Harry: Cool. Go for that. Joe: Now, you’ve used the term “chippy” a few times before. What exactly is that, and how is this a chippy?

Harry: I’d say it’s a uniquely British experience in a lot of ways. It’s a lot more focused on takeout than a classic restaurant. Obviously we have a table here, but for the most part, I don’t think chippies even really have tables. Or they’ll just have maybe a few stools and a bar that you can sit at to eat. They have this big counter where they keep all of the sort of pre-prepared food warm. Joe: It’s bright. Harry: A lot of metal surfaces that are easy to wipe down, ’cause obviously quite a lot of grease getting thrown around here. This very much looks and feels like a classic British chippy. Joe: The size of this piece of fish they’re bringing here, what! Bro, get out of here with this fish! The size of this fish! Harry: Thank you so much. Wow. Incredible. Yeah, that’s great. Thank you so much. [Joe laughs] Joe: I notice they put something green on the plate.

Harry: They did. We got some salad here. That’s not super common with your fish and chips. That’s, I think, a personal touch from Chris. Joe: I don’t think I’ve seen that in this country yet. Harry: No. [laughs] We’ve not been going to the establishments that specialize in salads so far. Everything we’ve been reviewing has just been various shades of brown. To see green, it’s just like, I’m like, “whoa!” It’s startling. Yeah. I’m going to go just straight fish. See how we go. Mm. Oh, my God, bro. Is this the same type of batter as the other places? They all do their own batter slightly differently. What’s so good is, I mean, it looks really crispy. Is it crispy?

Joe: This is, like, American crispy. This is like KFC-extra-crispy crispy. Harry: This fish has, like, more flavor than the other cods I’ve had before. Joe: Yeah. Harry: I’m going to guess it’s something to do with just freshness, ’cause this is just really flavorful. Honestly, same for the chips as well. I think it might sound like a stupid statement, but almost more of a potato-y flavor than what we’ve had before. All right. Switch. Harry: Yep. And I gotta say, man, the tartar sauce is top-notch.

Harry: Is it good? Joe: I feel that the tartar sauce is such an important part of the fish and chips. ‘Cause it’s really good. Like, it’s fantastic. I love it very much, and, to be honest, if I lived here and needed tartar sauce, I would buy this. You’re right. The sauce is really good. I love the texture of this one. I think that the plaice had more flavor for me personally. And I think you just get a lot more crisp when you have a flatter piece of fish, like a plaice. Joe: This is a thick-ass piece of fish. It’s cooked perfectly. The batter’s incredible. The fries are amazing. The tartar sauce, secret weapon. This is our curry? Harry: Try some curry sauce, man. Ooh, that’s good. [Joe yelps] Great counterpart to the chips. Dude. I’m telling you, that’s what America’s missing, man.

Harry: Just curry sauce? Yeah, curry sauce for fries. Especially for fries. You think Americans would like curry sauce? You think it would hit with the palate? I don’t see why they wouldn’t. Obviously we have our fish, have thoroughly enjoyed both of these, but we also have a battered sausage here for you, Joe. I don’t think I want that. Harry: Completely understand how it might not be the most appealing thing to look at. I will say, give it the benefit of the doubt. Joe: I’ll cut my own sausage. There’s, like, a spice to your guys’ sausage. It’s not as savory as an American sausage. Sure. Do you think it works with the batter?

Joe: Yeah, actually it does. Yeah. It’s just weird-looking. It’s a weird thing to do. You know? [Harry laughs] It’s like, yeah, OK. But, like, must we deep-fry everything? Coming from an American, that is a bold, bold claim. Joe: That’s right. Have you ever been to any sort of American state fair? We’ll deep-fry anything in our country. Except sausages, apparently, ’cause I haven’t seen this. Harry: Yeah. You draw the line at sausages.

Joe: Now I want to try to put as much of that stuff on, but, like, straight vinegar. I’m going to douse it, I’m going to drown it in vinegar and see what it’s — because I have this feeling like even though you can add a lot of vinegar to something — this is going to sound crazy. Everyone in the UK’s going to hear this and go, “This crazy American doesn’t know what he’s talking about. This crazy yank has no idea what he’s talking about.” I don’t think you can over-vinegar something. I think there’s a saturation point, and I think I could hit the vinegar saturation point and still be able to eat it and enjoy it. Harry: Fish and chips is a pretty important part of the UK culture. Do you have any kind of equivalent to that in the US? Like, do you guys eat fish and chips out there?

Joe: We have things called Irish pubs. Fish and chips, bangers and mash, shepherd’s pie, Guinness and Harp on tap. It’s more like something hot and brown and fried, you know what I mean? Harry: So you wouldn’t recommend a Brit go to Long John Silver’s for a taste of home? Joe: [laughs] Oh, my God. Long John Silver’s is so awful. It’s not, like, British-themed. It’s pirate-themed. Harry: Oh, God. Joe: Fantastic. What have you got for us, Chris? Joe: What is this? Chris: It is an old-school banana fritter. Ooh, look at that. That side is very hot. Be careful.

Joe: You got it. Chris: Enjoy. Joe: It’s a deep-fried banana? Banana fritter? It is. That’s a deep-fried banana right there. Is this normally on the menu, or have you gone, you’ve gone off … ? Chris: No. Only people that know. We’ve got a secret menu item. Man. Chris: It’s not secret anymore, is it? [everyone laughs] Harry: I know we’ve had a lot of fried food today, so I think the only logical thing is that we eat more fried food. What won’t you people deep-fry? [everyone laughs] I’m upset ’cause I know this is going to be amazing.

Harry: Our job is so hard. Joe: I know. Did you bite it? Harry: No. I just got a little bit of the sauce, and it does taste delicious. That’s so hot, but that’s really good! Joe: Oh, that’s fantastic. That is so fantastic. I don’t know why that’s not on the menu here. Harry: Right?! Have you had fried banana before? Joe: No. Harry: I don’t know if I have. You really get, like, a caramelized … Had a chocolate-covered banana, but not a fried one. Oh, man. [groans] [whimpers] Way too much! Harry: Joe might be flagging, but we’ve got another two fish-and-chip spots to hit. Our next stop is Fishcotheque. Joe: [laughs] Fishcotheque. One of the reasons why we brought you here is because this is currently the No. 1-reviewed fish-and-chip shop in London on Tripadvisor.

Joe: OK. Harry: So we’re going to see if the people of Tripadvisor know what they’re talking about. We should probably get another cod, just to keep it consistent. Joe: We already had haddock. Harry: We already had the haddock, so maybe try something else. Maybe a rock? Do you have any idea what a saveloy might be? OK. Says savory, and it says it’s served with chips, so I’m assuming it’s some sort of fish. Not quite. So, this is actually a sausage. I’m going to wait until you can see it — Not quite? I was completely wrong.

Harry: You were pretty pleased with that. There’s nothing to do with fish in sausage! [Harry laughs] I was way off. Harry: I’m going to wait till it arrives to see your reaction, because it’s, um, quite visually striking, I’ll put it that way. Joe: You’re taking me to the other side of the planet, you’re taking me someplace, and when you ask me if I know what something is and I say no, your response is, “We’ll just wait to see. Have it show up and see how you feel.” Like, you’re filling me with dread. Well, while I’m in the UK, I gotta get a Coke or something just ’cause it’s like, you guys have that regular sugar. Are you going to get a Coke? Harry: Yeah, why not? Joe: Let’s do a Coke. Here we have “original flavour non-brewed condiment.” Do you have any guesses?

Joe: That sounds like they’re just sidestepping the fact that it’s so fake, they can’t legally call it vinegar. Harry: That’s effectively what’s gone on here. To be called vinegar, legally, it has to — Joe: Have vinegar in it? Harry: Have vinegar in it. Joe: I was under the impression that vinegar’s, like, the cheapest thing in the world to make. I mean, you can get it by the gallons for, like, a buck, right? Harry: Yeah, well, this makes it even cheaper. So, just before the food arrives, I have just spotted something. I’ll be right back.

Joe: OK. Ah, toothpicks! Here we go. These are chip forks. Chip forks. Generally, if you’re going to take away your food, this is what you’ll be using to eat them on the way home. This is brilliant. I totally get this. This is actually such a good idea. But why this and not just a smaller fork with the four prongs? Harry: That is a good question. I wish I could tell you. It’s just kind of one of those things where, like, this is kind of how it’s always been done, and we’re just set in our ways with these things at the moment.

Joe: I think that is the best way to describe the UK in general. Harry: We’re not going to start seasoning our food now. Like, why would we? [Joe laughs] Joe: Yo, the big boy. Thanks, pal. Harry: Thank you very much. I mean, this is a big piece of fish. They couldn’t have gotten a different-size plate for this thing? It’s just kind of just rolling around. So, you have the rock. Joe: This is one piece of fish?

Harry: One piece of fish. Generous with the chips as well here. [Joe crunching] Ooh, that sounded crispy. I could hear that from here. That … dude. Dude. I’m not a tartar-sauce snob. Yeah, it’s Heinz 57. Gimme my boy Heinz. So, this is a thing for fish and chips in the UK, is serving a curry sauce? Yeah. It’s quite rare to find just curry sauce on its own on the menu in other places. You might get it in Chinese takeaways. Joe: Oh, yeah, I gotta go for that non-brewed condiment. And I hear I can be generous with it.

Harry: That’s so much. [laughs] Joe: Is it? Crew: So much. Joe: I wonder. Harry: Mine’s falling off already. Good stuff. Those fries, chips, cooked perfectly. Wow! Like, crispy enough, but, like, it isn’t too hot on the inside. No. Very fluffy on the inside. Joe: Yeah. Fluffy’s the word I’m looking for. These fries are good. These fries are real good. Oh, ooh! Harry: Right? You get it? That curry’s fantastic. Harry: Mm-hmm. So, I’ve got the cod, you’ve got the rock. We’ll try a bit and then we can swap again. Want to try it without the tarter, or does it matter? Harry: It’s up to you. I’m going to try it with the tartar. Harry: It’s crispy. Mm. Hot. This one seems like it’s not as fluffy. It’s denser. Which isn’t a complaint. I mean, it’s — Harry: Bit more meaty.

Joe: Yeah, more meatier. Harry: Yep. I’m told that the fryer here is 80 years old. So this thing, it’s seen some fish. Joe: I mean, is that a selling point? Harry: It’s retaining all that flavor from those 80 years, you know? Harry, my water heater’s 30 years old. That thing doesn’t work. I like the cod better, but I’m thinking in terms of, like, if I was going to eat all of this and not have to have four in one day, I think the cod would be more like a session fish. Like, I would love to eat that whole thing with the fries. This has a more savory flavor. Yeah. Much stronger flavor to that.

Joe: Which is great. Like, a bite is fantastic. But, personally, I don’t know if I could do this whole thing without just being like [groans]. I’d agree. That’s maybe a little bit heavier, a little bit denser. I couldn’t eat all this. It’s too hefty. Harry: I love the notion of a session fish. Like an IPA. I mean, we are basically sessioning. Joe: Yeah, yeah. More like an after-dinner fish. I’d probably go with this one instead. Does that make sense? Harry: Yeah, that works. That’s dessert fish. This thing has been taunting me this whole … so what are we doing here? Harry: This is the saveloy. So, what a saveloy is, is predominantly pork sausage. This is what an American hot dog would look like. It does a little bit, but as you can see, you can see inside it, and it looks more like a sort of classic British sausage. I think these used to be made from pork brains. I don’t think they are anymore, but don’t quote me on that. What’s it made of now? I think just kind of minced pork meat. I’m more concerned of what’s in it now, not what was in it in the ’70s. OK, well, let’s find out by tasting it. I feel like we can try a little bit, and then also, pretty good when mixed with the curry sauce. This tastes like it used to be made out of something gross. Like, I recognize the taste of meat, but this doesn’t taste right. It tastes like a sausage that’s wrong. Does that make sense?

Harry: I know we have more places to visit, but do you have room for maybe a little dessert? Joe: [sighs] Yes. Harry: OK. I’m going to go order. Joe: I hate to say it. I do. Server: Enjoy. Harry: Thank you. Server: Thank you. OK. So, Joe, this is a battered Mars bar. Joe: Hm! Harry: What does “Mars bar” mean to you? It’s a candy bar in the US that no one ever gets. In the UK, a Mars bar is I think closer to what you would think of a Milky Way bar being, and then our Milky Way bar, which we also have, I think is like a US 3 Musketeers. Gotcha. Harry: Up to speed. It’s a fairly traditional, I would say, chip-shop dessert in the UK. Joe: It is? Really?

Harry: Yeah. With the little drizzle on the plate and everything? They’ve gone kind of above and beyond with the presentation here. Often it would just be this. They batter it and then just deep-fry it. Joe: This is literally going to kill me. It might do, but a pretty good way to go out, right? Joe: Sure. Yeah. That is incredible. The caramel is what really does it. That’s a really good idea to deep-fry that. Harry: That little crispy bit on the outside, and then the warm, gooey caramel inside. Oh, man. It’s really good! Stop it. I’m simply built different. Crew: Oh, my God. Joe: Great fish and chips. Great desserts. Fishcotheque has exceeded my expectations. Yeah, I think mine too. Good food. All the classics done well. Joe: Absolutely. But we got more places to visit. You ready for the next one? I’m ready. You ready? I’m ready. Let’s go. Let’s go. Wow, cool. Oh, this is amazing. Crew: Oh, wow. Joe: Oh, look at the view! Harry: Here we go. Server: The menus.

Harry: What are you having, Joe? Thank you. Joe: Hm. Hm. Slow-roasted pork belly is really calling my name, but you know what? Kind of feeling fish and chips. Yeah, it’s been a while since I’ve had fish and chips. Maybe, like, two hours. Joe: Last place, Mayflower. It’s named after a boat? Harry: Yeah, I mean, you should know. It’s named after the Mayflower, aka the one that the pilgrims came to America on. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Ready for some history? [Joe sighs] The building has been around since the 1500s. Joe: That’s insanity. Harry: It’s been renamed a couple of times. Apparently it was The Spread Eagle and Crown. So apparently it was from the nearby landing steps to the pub that the pilgrim fathers set sail aboard the Mayflower. Joe: So this is the last stop before they went and sailed for six months? Harry: About three months, almost. Joe: Oh, God, on a boat?

Harry: On a boat. Like, back in the 1600s. Joe: I bet that thing smelled horrible. Yeah, hygiene. Joe: No one’s bathing. What’d they eat? Good question. Like, dried stuff. Maybe some fish and chips. They had a fryer on the ship? [crew laughs] Out of all the places we could have gone to, why here? Harry: I think one way to look at a British fish-and-chip experience is through the chippy, or a fish-and-chip restaurant. I think another is just having them in a pub. Fish and chips is on pretty much every pub menu in the UK. The food might be a little bit different to what we’ve had. Beer batter is pretty traditional. Obviously you’re in a pub, you’ve got a lot of access to beer, so you’re going to be battering things in the beer, which leads to quite a nice fluffy and crispy batter. And also the peas you might get. Probably not mushy peas, traditionally, although you might get that in some pubs, but it’s often just going to be kind of standard garden peas. Hey, there we go.

Server: Fish and chips. Joe: Thank you, sir. Server: You’re welcome. Joe: All right, fish and chips. Let’s go! [crew laughs] Harry: Go for some chips. Whoa, the chips are good. They’re real good. Do you see what I mean, how it’s slightly different to the style that we’ve had earlier? It is a bit flatter, I would say. So not quite as dense. These are pretty well fried, in terms of they’re quite crispy. Yeah. Are you liking that? Yeah. This I like. This beer I do not like. [Harry chuckles] You insisted I get the bitter shandy. Harry: Bitter shandy. It’s the traditional, although I have not done that so I’ve just kind of pushed that onto you. Joe: Yeah, suspicious, how I had to get it but you didn’t. Harry: Our last cod of the day. Let’s go for it.

Joe: First cod, pre-tartared. Is that beer batter? Harry: Mm-hmm. Yeah. Definitely stands out. A crispier — wow. Very good. I’m going to try this tartar. Look at the steam coming out of that thing. Harry: Looks good. It’s steaming. Joe: It’s, like … creamy? Not just this, but, like, the fish kind of melts in your mouth, right? It’s buttery, right? Yeah. Harry: Yeah. How? How did they do this? Harry: Really nice texture. Pretty much perfectly cooked. Flaky, juicy. I feel like we should try the peas. [Joe groans] They are un-mushed peas. I’m going to wash that down with something that’s slightly better tasting. [Harry chuckles] This is a children’s drink. But if you had to have peas with your dish, you would maybe prefer them mushy? Joe: Yeah, I like mushy peas. The keys to the kingdom is making your own tartar sauce. I don’t know how difficult it is to make.

Crew: No one’s really talked about tartar sauce yet, [cuckoo clock chimes] about what it is and why it was — Yo, there’s for real a cuckoo clock in here? Harry: That’s an actual cuckoo clock. That is really funny. Cuckoo clocks are only startling. Do you think people had them and they were like, “This is all we have. It’s this or nothing”? Like, I love my clock, but I wish it just scared me more. Boy, do I have an idea for you. You know what this clock is missing? Fright. OK. Come to think of it, I don’t even know what’s in tartar. What is tartar sauce? Harry: It’s a mayo-based sauce. They take the mayo, but then they jazz it up with some stuff. So maybe some diced pickles, maybe some capers, and then a few herbs and spices. Like, a bit of black pepper, salt, and I think dill is pretty common in there. It’s great, and it’s perfect with fish. Are people eating fish and chips without tartar sauce? No way. Not really. They shouldn’t be. All right, Joe. Joe: Sun is going down, candles are getting brighter, so why don’t we now decide what is the best fish and chips in the fine city of London?

Harry: You’ve mentioned a few things that could play into your decision there. I mean, obviously the quality of the fish, the chips, the tartar sauce. Taking all these factors into account, of the four that we tried today, which was your favorite? I mean, the first one, Poppies, was incredible, but was the first one off the gate. But they were tough to beat. I really liked everything about it. The haddock was really good. But then we went to Fishcotheque. Harry: Still good. I was really impressed. I mean, fantastic fish. But their tartar sauce, I mean, they just had the Heinz 57 stuff. They had the prepackaged stuff. It was like, come on, guys. Little effort on this. But I get it. Keeping in mind that every place was fantastic — and we’re talking razor-thin margins. [cuckoo clock chimes] [crew laughs] What? Who does that service? Who’s glad to hear that? There’s elements of a lot of the places that I liked that I don’t know necessarily should count towards the fish and chips. Like, I loved Poppies’ mushy peas, and this place, this beer-battered skin, and the way they cooked the fish? Fantastic. Oh, their tartar sauce here is so good. But I think Golden Chippy’s tartar sauce was better. So if I had to pick, and I know that I do, I’m gonna go Golden Chippy. The vibe of get it and go, or kind of come in and, like a neighborhood corner shop. Although we don’t have fish-and-chip spots like that in the US, I definitely thought it was more of my vibe of, like, quick in and out, incredibly friendly owner. I like that, ’cause I think that’s probably more representative of the average Brit experience that we’ll have at a fish-and-chip shop. I don’t even know what would be second, third, or fourth. They’re all fantastic. If I went to only one of these visiting London, I’d be very happy. Fine margins. Yeah. Very fine. It was great.

Harry: Nice. I guess that’s all. Cheers, buddy. Thanks! Harry: Cheers, man. Ugh! I hate it. Crew: All right, you can get a real beer now, Joe. Thank you, please.