I Got Married to My Husband Three Times in Less Than a Year

  • We had been dating for two years when my husband proposed.
  • Being a bicultural couple, we wanted all of our family and friends to see us get married.
  • We had three weddings: one in New York City, one in Uruguay, and one in Maine.

I hadn’t thought much about getting married until the day my then-boyfriend proposed on a deserted beach in Patagonia, Argentina. We had been dating for two years, living together for one, and while I knew I wanted to be with him forever, we hadn’t discussed what our wedding would look like at all.

With a deep-blue sapphire ring on my finger, we called our family to tell them the news. Immediately the dreaded questions started to pop up in every conversation: when and where were we getting married.

The “where” was the first challenge we had to overcome. I’m from Argentina and my husband is from Maine, two polar opposite locations on the globe. We wanted all of our extended family to be present, which meant we either found a neutral location or we flew everyone from north to south or vice versa.

The “when” was also complicated. My mother-in-law had been diagnosed with an inoperable and aggressive brain tumor, and we were racing against the clock.

After thinking about it for days and days, we decided that our love deserved to be celebrated more than just once. And to check all the boxes we both had, we needed to have more than one wedding. So we got married three times in under a year and had a blast at every single one of our weddings.

The first wedding happened super fast in NYC

We were living in New York City at the time, and at one point thought of doing a proper wedding there. However, after getting a couple of budgets from wedding venues we realized what we wanted was going to be out of our budget by a lot.

We still felt like we needed to celebrate where we had met and fallen in love, so we chose to get legally married in Brooklyn, one month after getting engaged.

Given that my mother-in-law was sick, and it was absolutely necessary for both of us to have our four parents present since we are very close to them, we decided that waiting for any longer was too much of a gamble to take. My parents had travel visas and were able to book a flight almost immediately.

Conz Preti and Zach Hefferen in New York City

 

The couple had a small dinner at one of their favorite bars in Brooklyn.

Courtesy of Gigi Gatewood

I bought my dress and shoes online without trying them. My husband ordered my bouquet from a local flower shop without me knowing. He wore a suit he already had and a pair of socks I gifted him for our first holidays together.

We chose to get married on


Black Friday

because we assumed that City Hall was going to be emptier than any other Friday during the month. We emailed all of our local friends and invited them to join us at City Hall or at a chill dinner and drinks at our local bar, where we had spent most of our dating days hanging out.

I didn’t expect the City Hall wedding to be as emotional as it was. The ceremony was incredibly touching and we live-streamed it on Facebook for everyone who couldn’t attend. The dinner was intimate and fun, and we ended the night taking shots behind the bar with our bartender friends.

The second wedding was in Uruguay

While I’m from Argentina, I spent many years vacationing in the neighboring country of Uruguay. It is hands down my favorite place in the world. Because our first wedding was during a cold and wet fall day, I wanted to have a summer beach wedding.

Given that not all of my family members had US visas and that my grandmother was 97 at the time, I wanted to make sure we had a celebration they could be part of. As an only child, I also knew it was very important for my parents that we would be blessed by a Catholic priest, so we chose to have a short, religious ceremony.

Conz Preti and Zach Hefferen in Uruguay

 

The second wedding was at the beach in Punta del Este, Uruguay.

Courtesy of Rodriguez Mansilla

This was by far the fanciest of the three weddings. We hired a wedding planner to help us with the logistics of planning a wedding from afar. We had interviews with DJs and photographers and had a food tasting with our caterer. For my wedding dress, I went to all the well-known bridal boutiques in New York City and chose my dress from the last store I went to.

Several of our friends from the US traveled to Uruguay and we had a blast mixing our groups and cultures. It’s been almost six years and my brother-in-law still talks about a traditional wedding sandwich that blew his mind and, to be fair, they are delicious.

The third wedding, in Maine, was the last hurrah for my mother-in-law

My husband’s family lived at a secluded farm in Maine in the ’80s, and he grew up spending most of his summers there. His mom had always wanted a big wedding or family party on the field, and knowing that she had months to live we decided to throw one last party to make her dream come true.

I took the backseat on this one and allowed my husband to plan the perfect lobster cookout. We had friends help us decorate the tables, paint signs for people to find the party, and got time to hang out with everyone before the actual wedding. One of our very close friends gifted us an oyster bar, which my dad still talks about; he probably ate hundreds of oysters himself. Our friends were the DJs and kept everyone dancing until the wee hours of the night.

Conz Preti and Zach Hefferen at their wedding in Maine

 

The third wedding was in Poland, Maine.

Courtesy of Fidelio Photo

Knowing that my husband was going to wear a seersucker suit, I went with a matching J. Crew skirt and a white crop top from H&M. We wanted to be summery, comfortable, and not super fancy.

One of our friends — coincidentally the reason why my husband and I met — my brother-in-law, and my parents were the only ones to be present at all three weddings. We understood that not everyone was going to be able to travel to our wedding locations, so having three of them allowed us to celebrate with everyone we loved.

Also, choosing locations where we didn’t need to rent venues allowed us to have bigger weddings without spending too much money.

When it comes to our anniversary, we only celebrate the day we got legally married. Mostly because we are really bad at remembering dates, so we choose to celebrate on Black Friday regardless of the calendar date so neither of us forgets to buy the other one a gift.

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